Lusaka, Zambia – In a statement that has sparked nationwide debate and both amusement and alarm, the Women Empowerment Agency (WEA) has issued a cheeky yet stern warning to President Hakainde Hichilema over the controversial proposal to make DNA tests free for the public.
Speaking to reporters in Lusaka, WEA Director Martha Tembo minced no words and no humour in her sharp critique of the proposal. “Your Excellency, if you make DNA testing free, forget 2026. You’ll be the first president in Zambia to lose an election because of paternity scandals!” she said with a half-smile that barely masked serious undertones.
A Threat to National Stability?
Tembo described the proposal as a potential “national crisis in disguise,” suggesting that widespread access to DNA testing could lead to an unprecedented wave of divorces, family breakdowns, and social unrest. She pointed to what she called the unsaid truth in many homes: “Let’s not pretend. Statistics and aunties at kitchen parties confirm what many fear — about 40% of married women have engaged in extramarital affairs.”
She continued, “Imagine every man rushing for a free DNA test like it’s Black Friday. It’ll be chaos. Marriages will collapse, children will be abandoned, and the courts won’t even have time to breathe!”
Defending the Status Quo
Tembo argued that the proposed free DNA testing policy threatens the delicate fabric of Zambian family life, particularly the widely accepted but unspoken belief that a child born in marriage is automatically considered the husband’s — resemblance or not.
“That’s how we’ve survived — that’s how we’ve kept peace,” Tembo declared. “You think you’re promoting science, but what you’re really doing is launching a war on family stability.”
She pointed to Tanzania as a model worth emulating, where the law presumes that children born within marriage are legally the husband’s, without room for genetic investigations. “That’s the African way,” she said. “That’s how we preserve unity, sanity, and Sunday family lunch.”
A Political Warning to UPND
Tembo ended her address with a pointed political warning to the ruling UPND government: “If this plan isn’t dropped, we’ll mobilize every married woman in this country to vote them out. Mark my words — no government survives when angry wives unite.”
Her remarks have since gone viral on social media, sparking laughter, heated debate, and reflective commentary on the complexity of family dynamics in Zambia. While some have applauded her courage for voicing a “hidden truth,” others argue that transparency and truth should not be feared in modern society.
The Bigger Picture
Though laced with humour, Tembo’s message touches on a serious dilemma: how to balance technological advancement and individual rights with cultural norms and national cohesion. Free DNA testing could empower individuals and bring clarity to uncertain parentage — but it may also shake traditional structures to their core.
Whether President Hichilema will proceed with the policy remains to be seen, but one thing is clear: if free DNA testing becomes law, Zambia may be on the verge of its own version of a reality TV reckoning — one swab at a time.